Thursday, August 7, 2008

chemical change

So, I hung out with Sharon today. It's the first time in probably a year and a half that I've spent time with her, and it's the first time in a much longer time that I spent time without being pissed at her. Even though I'm not mad at her it just didn't feel right. We're never going to be as close as we were in High School. Do you remember in middle school when we learned the difference between a chemical change and a physical change? Well, the anger and bitterness in our relationship has acted as a chemical change. Something has changed that will never be able to go back to how it was before. I mean, some fights are equivilent to a physical change, such as the one within my group of college friends. We were all pissed at eachother, but we were able to get past it and be just as comfortable with eachother. It's not like that with Sharon. I mean, don't get me wrong, I had a good time at the park and mall. I just didn't feel as close to her. I felt I had to be someone other than who I actually am. I'm not sad about this. In fact, I feel pretty good about it. I knew we were growing a part, but I think Sharon thought it was my fault entirely. Today showed us that we are still friends, but neither of us are the same people we were when we were roommates on tour. We will never be T1 and T2 anymore, and honestly, I'm ok with that. I like who I am, and have my new, real friends to thank for it. I'm ready to let the past go and move on with my life. It's about time I do.


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