Wednesday, May 16, 2012

Enjoy the Silence: Day 7

Day 7: Exodus 4:1-5
Moses answered, “What if they do not believe me or listen to me and say, ‘The Lord did not appear to you’?”

Then the Lord said to him, “What is that in your hand?”
“A staff,” he replied.
The Lord said, “Throw it on the ground.”

Moses threw it on the ground and it became a snake, and he ran from it.

Then the Lord said to him, “Reach out your hand and take it by the tail.” So Moses reached out and took hold of the snake and it turned back into a staff in his hand.

“This,” said the Lord, “is so that they may believe that the Lord, the God of their fathers—the God of Abraham, the God of Isaac and the God of Jacob—has appeared to you.”

When people think of Moses they don’t usually associate him with fear.  People always remember him as a great leader and prophet.  Honestly that is only part of the story.  In the beginning, he was a chicken.  That is evident in Moses’ call story.  He comes up with excuse after excuse to not have to what God is asking him to do.  Each time God removes the obstacle that Moses builds. 

Even when God is being faithful, Moses freaks out.  Moses worries that no one will believe he has spoken to God.  God tells Moses to throw his staff on the ground.  So, “Moses threw it on the ground and it became a snake, and he ran from it.”  Moses ran from the miracle God provided to serve as proof for that had sent Moses.  The man was talking to a bush that was burning without being consumed, and it was the snake he ran from.  Because clearly the snake is the unusual/scary part of that picture…

To be fair, though, I probably would have run too.  I have before.  Certain ‘spiritual gifts’ that I have can be mildly terrifying.  They tend to happen more frequently and more intensely when I am closer to God.  How do I cope with the intensity?  I run away from it.  The more distance I can put between myself and God, the safer I feel.  Frankly, I’m only kidding myself when I do that. 

Recently, I was talking with a friend about spiritual gifts.  I was telling her about mine when she commented that she would love to experience just a fraction of what I have.  I don’t usually feel that way about it. Honestly, I have a hard time calling them gifts most of the time, because they have caused so much discomfort for me.  When they are active, I would give anything to make them go away.  I run.

I don’t want to run anymore.  I am the one who asked to be used for God.  Granted I was in 3rd grade, but it still counts!  Moses didn’t ask to be used like he was.  His new found responsibilities came out of nowhere.  It’s no wonder he ran.  I prayed to be used.  I need to stop running.  God got Moses through; in the end he will do the same for me. 

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