I don’t know what it is about spring, but this time every year my desire to go on an adventure is awakened. Something about spring makes me hope that Peter Pan would come through my window and tell me the Lost Boys need a mother. Makes me long for a blue Police Box that is bigger on the inside to bring the Raggedy Doctor into my life, even if it means I have a lot of running in my future. I want to become the heroine of my story, not a passive bystander.
I never really know how to put this feeling into words. I do know that it is like a fire burning in the pit of my stomach. It is in the same place where I feel nervousness or shame, but it is an entirely different feeling. It moves from my core and spreads through my limbs making me antsy for whatever it is that is coming my way.
This is the same feeling that has caused me to try to pack a bag and skip town every time there is a natural or man-made disaster. More than once my mom has walked in on me throwing clothes and toiletries into a dufflebag. The first time she didn't even know what to do with me. She stood in my doorway asking me what I was doing. “Mom, didn't you hear? There was a tsunami in the Indian Ocean. It has killed a lot of people and I need to go help.” She wouldn't let me go. In her defense, I was only in High school, and didn't have a passport. The same feeling was awakened when Hurricane Katrina hit New Orleans. Once again, I tried to physically go help. Again, mom wouldn't let me.
The cycle continued when I watched the Invisible Children movie as a senior in High School. I tried to leave, mom put me on lock down. I started to realize that my intentions were good, but my application did not match where I was in my life. Instead of trying to do it on my own, I started talking to my peers. This was too big to let go without doing something. We decided that if we cannot go to help fix the problem, we would help raise money so other people can do what we can’t. We held a benefit concert to raise money and awareness.
After all of these my hunger for adventure was satiated, but barely. Now, nothing is quenching that fire. I was thinking about this on my way home from giving my siblings a ride to school. I was struck with how tame our faith has become. The reason I am so antsy and so hungry for adventure is because that is what we were created for. When we look at the stories of the Ancients of faith we see them walking closely with God, and their stories are so full of danger, impossibilities, and love. They live adventurous lives.
The more time you spend with someone, the more you become like them. We see this clearly with the disciples. They spend three years with Jesus, learning to love people alongside their master. Once Jesus went back to the Father, they were still on earth to finish out the adventure he had sent them on. They were healing people, casting out demons, facing down angry mobs with stones and a few even took on royalty, all in the name of Christ. There had to be moments were they looked at each other and asked, “is this real life?” That life is more real and fiery than all the mediocre, lukewarm lives people live today.
Today I realized that when I am craving adventure, what I am really craving is a closer connection with Jesus. The adventure will come naturally. First, I need to learn how to walk with Jesus, and hear his voice clearly, and then I can learn to run. It’s not about what I can do, but about how much I love spending time with God. If I rest into Him, he will give me the desires of my heart; no deep relationship with Jesus can be dull. So, let’s do it! Let’s dive in head first and live the dynamic lives we were created for. No more boring half asleep lives. It’s time to wake up and walk so close to the fire of God that we can’t help but light on fire ourselves.