My Newest Job

There is a certain peace that comes with doing what you know you were made to do.  Your body may be tired and achy, but your spirit just soars so high it’s like it can touch God.

That is how I felt tonight.  I have started running the Kid’s Club for SON Ministries’ ESOL classes.  Basically, I hang out with anywhere from 50 to 70 kids whose parents are in class learning English.  It is such a cool place to see God moving. 

I filled in for my predecessor last year.  She had fallen and broken her arm playing soccer with some of the kids.  Kim, the woman in charge of SON, called me to see if I could come be the substitute.  I fell in love with those kids.  Most of them are rough around the edges, and they are definitely not church kids, and that is why I love them. 

My first day as the official gym leader I spent fifteen minutes playing catch with a boy who spoke next to no English.  That didn’t stop us from giggling and having a blast.  He would point over my shoulder, as though there was something I needed to look at.  When I would “fall for it” he would just burst into fits of laughter.  It was a beautiful moment. 

Tonight we had a group of the Columbus Young Professionals come in to play games with the kids.  One of the gentlemen brought a backpack with paper in it.  He taught some of the kids origami.  I talked to him briefly afterwards.  He said he had planned on leaving an hour earlier than he actually left.  He still had a job to go to after he left from ESOL.  He seemed a little flustered, but I don’t know that he saw the joy that extra hour brought to the kids.  I had one boy who would not leave when his mom wanted him to, because he just wanting to talk with me about the origami art that the CYP member had made. 

My first night I had the opportunity to speak with a volunteer who had just started that night as well.  She said she had wanted more volunteer opportunities, and this seemed perfect since she was the daughter of immigrants.  She said that the ESOL program, including Kid’s Club, would have been so nice to have had twenty years ago when they moved here and were trying to learn English.  When I connected with her on Thursday she really seemed to be enjoying her time with the kids.  That is huge. 

It is incredible to me the way some of the students matured in the last year.  There is a particular set of twins, a boy and a girl, who were constantly at each other’s throat last year.  So far I have only had to break up one spat between them, knock on wood, and the girl was one of the first students to ask if I needed help with anything on Thursday.

It is so neat to see how God is at work in these students and volunteers.  It is a different atmosphere than I am totally used to, though.  Unlike Impact, at Kid’s Club God is more covert, yet I see him moving so apparently that it brings my heart such joy. 

This is where my heart is right now.  I love it.  

~~~

If you are interested in volunteering with SON Ministries go here.

25 Before 25: Updated

So, on New Year’s Eve I had a realization.  I only have one full year until I am 25.  That means I only have one year and a couple months to finish my 25 before 25 list.  So, I went back and looked at the list.  Some of the things on I’m not really interested anymore.  I’m going to switch some for ones that I actually want to do.  So, here is my updated 25 Before 25 list:

 

My 25 Before 25: Updated

1. Graduate from college
2. Run a 5k
3. Start my own business

4. Go to New York for the New Year's Eve ball drop
5. Become better at slowing down and enjoying the moment
6. Weigh less so I have more energy and get off the sidelines.
7. Get better at Spanish

8. Go paint balling
9. Learn to play the guitar (or ukulele) better
10. Visit Martha in Buffalo
11. Go on a mission trip
12. Move out of my parents' house
13. Buy a car
14. Go geocaching and actually find something
15. Help (at least) one person to become more compassionate toward the world outside of the USA
16. Spend less time angry with God, and more time in praise-filled prayer
17. Go on a road trip
18. Start writing a book.
19. Help build a house (with Habitat or another group)

20. Start working on getting my teaching license.
21. Visit Ground Zero in New York
22. Go to Daytona for the Student Life at the Beach youth conference.
23. Find a community of believers my own age and get plugged in with them. (01-28-2013)
24. Try Deep Fried Kool-Aid

25. Have Breakfast at Tiffany’s 

Some of these I should be able to knock out together.  I already have plans with friends to go to New York for the ball drop this coming New Year’s. I figure we can visit Ground Zero, and I’m sure I can convince at least one of them to have breakfast with me outside of Tiffany’s.  As for some of the others, I’ve got my work cut out for me.

If any of these seem like fun to you, feel free to let me know, and I will bring you along on my adventures.

I'm the Villain

I am so tired of being the villain in my family.  I feel like nothing I do is good enough. 

So, on top of trying to come to grips with Dad saying I have secondary Power of Attorney I am also being told I am selfish.  Months ago I committed to going on the confirmation retreat, the retreat is this weekend.  I was hoping to still go, since I really hate being in hospitals.  I thought my mom would understand.  She keeps saying that I shouldn't put the responsibility of taking care of Alex on Sarah.  By asking that of me she puts it on me.  It's like she doesn't see how much this all is hurting me.

As mom and I are talking about this all Sarah comes in and rips into me saying how selfish I am and that I only think of myself.  I am tired of them not seeing how much all of this is tearing my up.  I hate that I am an internal processor.  I wish my family trusted me more to think about people other than myself.  I wish they thought higher of me.  I guess I'm not as good as I have always thought.

Maybe I am selfish.  But I don't think that makes me the villain they make me out to be.  I'm just sick of the crap.

Bomb

So, I have been working on and refining two blog post that I was going to post today and tomorrow before I had a bomb dropped on me.  For those who don't know, my dad is having a total hip replacement on Friday after suffering bone on bone pain for the last I don't even know how long.

That is fine, I have known this was coming for a while.  What I didn't see coming was dad handing me a packet with his living will in it.  In the living will, he gave me secondary power of attorney.  If something happens to dad, and mom can't bring herself to tell the doctors to take him off life-support I have to do it. 

I am not even able to throw away papers from elementary school.  I don't want this kind of responsibility.  I wish he would have just asked me so I could tell him how afraid this makes me.  I am a hot mess right now, and I don't even know what to do to pull myself together.  I wish I had someone here to be with me during this. 

This just feels so heavy, and I feel really alone.

Pinterest Night

Tonight was a good night.  Andrea came home for Thanksgiving break, and for the last week we have been planning a pinterest/movie night.  I wanted to make ornaments for my cousins this year, and thought that tonight would be the perfect night for that.  Turns out I was right.  So, with Elf in the DVD player and Andrea reciting every other line I set up my craft stuff.  

These are my (mostly) finished ornaments.

To make them I combined two different pinterest ornaments.  First I started with the Crayon Drip Ornament (found here).  To make them, you take a clear glass ornament and take the top part off.  Then you drop a couple chunks of crayons into them and use your hairdryer on high to heat up the crayon.  As the way melts turn the ornament to spread the color out.  Warning:  The ornaments get really hot so be sure you are moving them around a lot so you don’t burn yourself, and just use common sense.

After that part was done I felt like the ornaments didn’t look finished.  I really wanted to make them sparkly, so I followed the directions I pinned for the No-Mess Glitter Ornaments (found here).  Basically you take floor wax and coat the inside of the bulb, making sure you pour out the excess floor wax.  Then you put glitter in and shake until it is well coated.  The floor wax makes the glitter stay and since the glitter is inside the ornament there is pretty much no mess.  It’s a win-win.

While we watched the genius that is Elf, we also ate some Peppermint White Chocolate popcorn.  (Inspired by this)  The first two bags of popcorn I made were and epic fail.  The first was burnt and the second didn’t pop all the way.  I made Andrea make the next bag, and it turned out just right.  While the popcorn was in the microwave I unwrapped a handful of the peppermint kisses and tossed them in the popcorn when it was out and I put it in a bowl.  I mixed it all together while the popcorn was still hot.  We were all a little unsure about the popcorn before we tried it, but it was actually a lot better than we anticipated.  I was a fan.

Galatians 3

Recently I haven’t been able to get enough of the book of Galatians.  It’s like, every time I read in Galatians, God hits me upside the head with some major truth I have either never seen or have forgotten.  That’s what happened tonight.  

So, I’m reading the third chapter when I come across verses 8 through 12.  They read: 

Scripture foresaw that God would justify the Gentiles by faith, and announced the gospel in advance to Abraham: “All nations will be blessed through you.”  So those who rely on faith are blessed along with Abraham, the man of faith.  

For all who rely on the works of the law are under a curse as it is written: “Cursed is everyone who does not continue to do everything written in the Book of the Law.”  Clearly no one who relies on the law is justified before God, because “the righteous will live by faith.”  The law is not based on faith; on the contrary, it says, “The person who does these things will live by them.”

The phrase that stuck out to me the most is the very last one.  “The person who does these things will live by them.”  When Paul uses that he is trying to show that if you live by the law you have to stick to it.  There is no other way to salvation than by works.  We know Paul does not actually think that, but rather knows there is no way to salvation that by faith.  

If I chose to try to earn my way into heaven I am going to have to work really hard.  Not just that, but no matter the effort I put in I still won’t be good enough.  I would have to literally live by every single rule, and even then my sinful nature would totally ruin any chance I have of salvation.  If you have a cake, but one of the eggs that went into that cake was spoiled, the whole cake is spoiled.  It’s not like you can seek out and destroy the particular germs to save the rest of the cake.  It may be beautiful on the outside, but it is literally rotten at its core.  That is the human condition.  

Now, the opposite is true as well.  Previous to these verses Paul reprimands the Galatians for forgetting the Gospel they had once heard and believed.  He says, “I would like to learn just one thing from you: Did you receive the Spirit by the works of the law, or by believing what you heard? Are you so foolish?  After beginning by means of the Spirit, are you no trying to finish by means of the flesh?” (Galatians 3:2-3)  What is started by God can only be finished by God.  We kid ourselves when we act as though anything other than that is true.  It’s just foolishness.